Reflecting on Communication in the Early Childhood Field

            These blog assignments allow us colleagues to share our personal stories and experiences to give others a different perspective on each topic we learn about. We have all come a long way, and I am sure many of us can finally see that light at the end of the tunnel. Only four more classes before we have out Masters in Early Childhood Studies! I am so thankful for everyone that has contributed to my learning abilities and successes here at Walden. Without the support and additional knowledge from all of you, I would not be where I am today!

            If anyone is taking the Administration route, I am sure I will see your name shortly! Also, I have recently joined the Walden University Early Childhood Education – WUECO on Facebook which honestly has been a lifesaver. It allows alumni and new students to all connect on one page, offer advice, discuss the hardships of online learning and working full time, and even provide job opportunities! I can also be contacted by email; n.magri89@gmail.com

I wish all of you nothing but the best on the rest of your journey and look forward to working with some of you in the future. Here’s to the last leg of our education! Good Luck everyone!

Adjourning

            When I first got my foot in the door for early childhood education, I got a lead teacher job for the toddler classroom. The facility had 8 different classes and had about 12 different ladies working in the building. At first, I felt on the outs, I was the new girl, and many of these teachers were already together for 4-5 years. As we had professional development classes and monthly meetings, I began to open up some more and indeed made some fantastic friendships. I was there for about 4 years before I moved on to become a nanny due to my director having a hard time with me going back to school. I respected my director and had no problems with going to her to discuss any ideas or issues I was having in my classroom. When I told her I was going to go back to school to get a degree in Early Childhood, she said to me that it was unnecessary and a waste of money. What I realized was that she would have to increase my pay due to my higher education and she was not prepared to do so. I had to do what was best for me even though leaving my colleagues killed me.

            We had an incredible bond, we were always there to help one another, and our students gained the education they deserved because of our collaboration. As my last day approached, we had a goodbye party, and I cried as if I was losing a family member, I didn’t realize how all these girls became my work family and how much we all cared about one another. Without the support of these ladies, I probably would not have gone back to school, and I would not have made lifelong friends. Even though many of us have gone our own separate ways, we are still all in the early childhood field, and we all help one another when needed.

            As my colleagues and I are extremely close to finishing our Master’s Degree I know that it will be a great day for all of us. We all had similar goals and as a collective group, we have all helped one another succeed in this program. I am hoping to stay in contact with most and I know Walden’s Facebook group is a great way to do so. As we go our separate ways we all can help one another in the classroom. We know how successful this group was and of course it will be a bittersweet day, but I know that we will continue to support one another in life and as an early childhood professional.

Nonviolent Communication and Conflict Management

          My husband and I have recently become homeowners, and it has been a real blessing. My brother has recently re-enlisted with the United States Navy and got orders for recruitment in Staten Island. We currently live on Long Island and since his apartment was not ready to be moved into we decided he could live with us for a few weeks before moving to Brooklyn. With three adults and a large dog, it is pretty tight but we have managed, and my husband has been a saint about the situation. I currently work 12-13 hour days and am out of the house a majority of my day while my husband is a schoolteacher who works 2 miles from home. My husband tends to call me every day around the same time saying how my brother hasn’t left the house, there is a pile of laundry, there are dirty dishes in the sink, and I usually become annoyed with these conversations. Instead of coming to me with problems, how about coming to me with solutions. Since it is my little brother, I tend to enable his bad behavior and just clean up after him, and it is taking a toll on my relationship with my husband.

            As soon as I walk in the door, I already have an attitude because I am prepared to be doing laundry and cleaning for the next two hours and I snap at my husband. I have a sense of entitlement since I feel I work harder and longer hours and he should pick up some of the slack. These arguments are causing us to go to bed angry and have us continue being upset with one another. I know that this situation isn’t forever, but it seems that way.

            What can help us resolve the conflict is to come up with some type of agreement and to also have a conversation with my brother. For someone who is at home ninety percent of the day should be able to clean up after himself. The three of us must sit down and come up with some solution for us to work together. I also need to keep my outbursts to a minimum. I tend to jump down my husband’s throat and say things I truly do not mean and once I say it I can no longer take it back. I must think before I speak and ensure my reactions are positive and not hurting someone else’s feelings or their character.

Who Am I as a Communicator?

           The links that were provided for us gave me some insights of where my abilities and limitations lie. What I found shocking was that my husband gave me a score of 36 for my Communication Anxiety Inventory, which I gave myself a 49. I do not mind speaking in large settings amongst family or friends, but in a room of strangers, I typically struggle. He see’s me as this very outgoing woman who is not afraid to express her ideas or feelings, but internally, I have a battle, my hands become sweaty, my heart begins to pound, and I feel like I am on the verge of a panic attack. I prefer one-on-one or a small group of acquaintances to have a conversation with. During meet the teacher night I feel comfortable within my surroundings because I get to know the parents for two weeks that lead up to that night. When doing Professional Development courses that take place at our local community college, I typically sit back, listen to others viewpoints, take notes, and try to avoid being called on. I was also like this in my high school classrooms, I prefer to listen than to speak facts or answer questions.

            I also had my brother take the three tests, and for the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale, he gave me a score of 42. He believes that I am respectful to listen to others viewpoints and try to gain all the facts before making any remarks. However, when I took the exam, I obtained a score of 56. I do believe I have respect for others opinions, but I can become aggressive when trying to get my point across. I realized that these three tests showed me where I can better myself and how I can work on my communication skills in-group settings and how not to shut down individual’s ideas so quickly. I look forward on bettering myself as a professional in the early childhood field and as an individual.

Communicating Differently & Effectively

I tend to communicate differently when working with children, when talking with family members, and even talking with friends. I also recognize that I express myself differently through body language, at work I carry myself as a professional, I do not slouch, I make eye contact, and I am an effective listener. When speaking with my mother, I typically use formal language and use polite words that I would not usually use when talking with friends. When speaking with my brother or friends I frequently use slang words, OMG, LOL, Yah, but with my parents its May I, Thank You, and Please. During this course, I am trying to carry over a more professional side when talking with friends and also working on effective listening. I sometimes do not use direct eye contact, or I cross my arms and lean on one side of my body which could come off negatively to family members, colleagues, and students parents.

            I also became conscious of how my culture can facilitate negative communication skills, as an Italian-American, I use my hands, I have a potty mouth, and I can become extremely short with individuals when I feel I am being attacked. These traits can sometimes carry over into my professional life and cause more harm than good. Becoming conscious of these behaviors and expressions I can improve myself as a professional, friend, daughter, wife, and person. There are many strategies that ensure effective communication, such as, following the Platinum Rule, being aware of our limitations and abilities, focus on the other individuals feelings and thoughts, paying attention to non-verbal expressions, and listening to the true meaning of a conversation. Understanding where I struggle will allow me to grow as a professional and become an effective communicator and listener when working in the early childhood field and as an individual.

Communication Skills: Language, Nonverbal, Listening

           My family has been telling me to watch Blue Bloods for a while now, but with the limited time I have, I barely watch television as it is. So I decided this is the perfect opportunity for me to watch an episode and see what all the hype is about. Tom Selleck has always had a demeanor where he knows it all, as I begin watching it seems that he always has an answer for everything but also shows compassion. He is a family oriented man, and you can see this at any moment they are at the dinner table as a large clan. New Yorkers always talk with their hands, and I do not see many hand gestures when the family is together. As I continue to see other family members in a courtroom, or in a cop car, it seems that they truly love what they do and they do it because of their father (police commissioner). Honestly watching this show with the sound off was hard for me to understand certain scenarios that happened in the show, it seems they accused a lot of individuals before finding the attacker, killer, robber or thug that did break the law. The family is a tight bunch of individuals, and that was easy for me to read, even with no sound, you could see that they would talk as a family and help one another in any situation.

            I believed the police officers would interrogate many individuals to find the correct person behind the crime. It seemed they were hard on these possible heathens, but many were just looking for a lead to continue on with their investigation. Tom Sellek does have “a know it all” personality for this particular role, but he is compassionate and loves what he does. He is always willing to help a family member or even someone in his office and gives them the advice they need to hear, even if it's not what they want to hear. My assumptions of the family dinners were that they were a close-knit family, and I still do believe that, as I listened to the television show. Honestly, I got drawn in, and it is not a half bad show to become addicted to.

            If I was a individual who watched this show on a weekly basis I would probably be able to read more family members a little bit better besides Tom Sellek, Donnie Wahlberg looks like a difficult person to work with and even a tougher father to deal with. He loves his family, and wants the best for them; he even does the same for his partner Jackie. While there are many cast members and different stories going on within the show, I was able to get a basic understanding of just throwing on an episode. But I believe if I was like my grandmother, who never misses her Blue Bloods, I am sure I would have had some biases by just watching interactions without the sound. Seeing what I picked up on during the first run through, I was able to focus on their facial expressions, how they interacted through gestures and greetings but still have difficulty connecting individuals to who they truly were in the show. It was a different experience watching a television show without the sound but I enjoyed being able to pay attention to the smaller details first and then re-watching with the sound.

Effective Communication

       I have always admired how my best friend communicates with her colleagues, clients, and even myself. She is always to the point but also listens and gives excellent advice. Effective communication is not just exchanging information but also understanding the emotion and even intentions behind the words. She is an engaged listener and observer, as we have been viewing our weeks learning resources, many forms of communication is nonverbal. You must read the individuals movements and also focus on what they are truly saying. Amanda has always been intuitive, and can read me better than I can read myself. The way my voice sounds, she knows if something is wrong. By being such an engaged listener she truly understands what I am trying to convey, even if I cannot find the right words, she fully understands my meanings. I always have admired the way she speaks with any individual and now as she takes a huge leap of faith and traveling the world for a year. I know many people will be blessed to have crossed her path, she is the best person I know when it comes to solving problems and giving superb advice. I can only hope to learn to read others as she does and become a more active listener when communicating with students, colleagues, parents, and even family and friends.